Social interactions between individuals of varying structure is a complex topic, especially as we think about larger groups.
One way to conceptualize interactions is via an idea called “The Big Other”, which comes from Jacques Lacan’s “register” of the Symbolic.
The Big Other
Symbolic order, namely, the overarching “objective spirit” of trans-individual socio-linguistic structures configuring the fields of inter-subjective interactions.
In simpler terms, it’s the mirror through which the first four structures see and make meaning of the world. The “world” in this context mostly refers to the world of people and society.
People’s relationship to the Big Other is similar to that with their mother.
Detached people haven’t fully re-attached to their mother, so the Big Other is an entity of alienation, of desire but suspicion.
Those early in structure have no idea what the Big Other is or what it wants; always out of sync with its arbitrary standards and expectations.
e.g. small talk, navigating bureaucracy, making connections with others, accurately perceiving humour, nuance, or implication.
Those late in structure are acquainted with the Big Other, but it still doesn’t quite make sense, feels like it’s not “right” in many cases.
Like a beautiful woman in a window across the street, you can watch and learn about her, but she is just out of reach; you can never truly know her or feel like she’s yours.
Psychotic people have an almost codependent relationship with the Big Other, like a typical 1-year-old relationship with its mother. Clingy, adoring her, but also willing to lash out and take out its frustrations on her.
The outside world and its order is almost seen holy. Mother earth, “we are the universe”, etc.
In late structure, the relationship becomes more interactive, like the Big Other is slipping them secret messages because they’re so special (schizophrenic), or that it’s punishing them for their flaws or indiscretions (paranoid).
Of all structures, the most attached and willing to go along with it, feeling like they have a special bond with it, wanting to be integrated.
Neurotic people have a more “formal” relationship with the Big Other, more like a teacher or a judge.
Focused on being a good boy/girl, to do what is good and right.
More protective of the Big Other, not violating social norms, not upsetting it.
Caring about what’s “normal” and what “should” happen.
Perverts see themselves as the object of the Big Other’s enjoyment. An entertainer to satisfy the Big Other’s secret desire.
To please the Big Other, not by being a good boy/girl, but by going above and beyond to satisfy its true desires. Provide it something it didn’t even know it needed/wanted.
Example: At a party, everyone suspects Amy and Ben have a crush on each other.
i.e. everyone knows except the Big Other. Each person knows the fact in their internal world, but it doesn’t exist as a fact in the external world.
If someone were to stand up and say, “Amy and Ben have a crush on each other!” that’s the equivalent of telling the Big Other. That’s why people would have a strong reaction to that, it would seem awkward and unacceptable actually to do that, but why? If everyone already knows? It’s because one “person” doesn’t know - the Big Other. And that’s where all meaning and compulsion to act and everything is “stored”, so despite not changing anything in terms of what people know, it changes everything in terms of what people are compelled to do
The early Detached person doesn’t really understand the Big Other, so they might just make some explicit reference to it and cause everyone to feel embarrassed and awkward. Or even if they’re not the one saying it, they don’t know that it’s something the Big Other doesn’t know, so they become very confused when everyone’s mood suddenly changes after this statement is made.
The late Detached person usually knows better than to actually say something like that, but doesn’t really know why - what’s the big deal after all? It’s because the late detached person doesn’t have a strong relationship with the Big Other so they don’t feel much compulsion in terms of changing their course of action depending on what the big other does/doesn’t know. They can know enough to guess that the statement is going to have an effect on other people, but it still doesn’t have much of an effect on them.
Each Psychotic is going to be a bit different, of course, have different beliefs and relationship with the Big Other, just like each Psychotic has a somewhat different relationship with their mom, but there is still a generic “mom-child relationship” that remains constant.
Their compulsion to act would largely depend on whether they think the Big Other (the world at large) would approve of/desire for Amy and Ben to be dating. If so, they now feel compelled to encourage them to hook up, to cheer them on, and so forth. If not, they feel compelled to discourage them, play it down, pretend it was never said. Either way, it’s now a compulsion, something they feel they have to do, and it’s unfortunate because that might conflict with some of their other goals (maybe it makes their friendships with Amy and Ben awkward, or maybe they had a crush on Amy themselves, or maybe they just had better things to do than play matchmaker).
Similar as if if a little old lady falls on the street in front of you, you “have to” stop and help her up, in this case they “have to” now commit to some course of action for Amy and Ben
For the Neurotic, instead of what the Big Other desires in terms of Amy and Ben specifically, their thoughts are more along the lines of what a “good girl” or “good boy” does in such a situation. Following certain principles or rules, essentially. Is it more important to respect people’s privacy? To promote love and helping people match up with their soulmates? Would a girl girl avert their eyes and look away from the autistic guy who made everything awkward, or would she scold him to make sure he knew he wasn’t “following the rules”? Before the Big Other was notified, the Neurotic was free to do as they pleased, but now they’re being “graded” on how well they respond to this situation.
For the Pervert, it represents an opportunity, some raw material. How can this be spun so that the Big Other comes away from it better off? Maybe take the opportunity to pull the attention away from Amy and Ben (because I don’t think love blooms well with undue attention) and turn it into an opportunity to introduce concept of the Big Other to the party guests, and in this way provide entertainment value, educational value, etc. Or, if I don’t think that’s likely to go down well, I might instead use it as a segue to a joke about how the champagne makes all of us feel a little bit in love with each other, so that people are amused and feel relieved that I’ve removed the compulsion to act from them. Something like that. Basically I see, “Oh no, a violation of social norms! Quick, don’t let the crisis go to waste - make something useful out of it.”
Like if a woman drops her handkerchief, that’s the perfect opportunity for a man to flirt with her by “saving” her. Similarly, if the Big Other is “violated” or “upset” or something else, it’s the perfect opportunity for the Pervert to show off the value he can create.
For Seminal and later, the Big Other is considered to be dead so anything they do might be in its memory or honor or something else but there’s no direct interaction with it anymore